Being Happier: it might be an easier goal.

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ecently I was seeing my eye doctor and he unexpectedly had a brilliant conversation with me about being happier.  He told me I’m very sensitive to small changes in prescription, meaning that it is difficult to find a lens that totally fulfills what I’m looking for.  When we finally decided on the right “dose” I asked him if I would be happy.

His response to me was that I probably wouldn’t be happy, but I would be happier.

That really stuck with me and it felt like a little piece of gold that I thought could be really helpful for my patients or for anyone who is on their own pursuit of happiness.  Usually, when someone is at the point of needing treatment, they are at a place in their life where they are quite deeply unhappy.  When you’re unhappy, it’s really easy to detect it… but the realization that quickly follows, is that it will be so.much.work to actually become happy.  This unfortunately keeps a lot of people stuck in patterns that really don’t work for them.

Most people have a sense of the things in their lives that aren’t ideal or that they want to make changes to but often the changes that need to happen feel so daunting that it can be easier to stay stuck.  There is also a tremendous fear of failure and of the unknown so when you add that to the mix I’m never surprised when I hear just how long my patients have actually been suffering.

But what if we could reframe this thinking and what if the goal was actually just to be happier.  Happier today than you were yesterday or last week or last year.  What if we only needed to make tiny adjustments or tiny tweaks so that it felt manageable?  It’s amazing how quickly tiny steps add up to a major step and also how quickly momentum can build once steps are being taken.  What would you do differently if your only goal was to be a little bit happier?

If this connects with you, I encourage you to think about any little thing you could do for yourself.  If you need any help with this, we’re always here.

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